Decisions, Decisions: Botox or Kindle 2?
Sadly, Strattera didn't transform me into a normal person--unless normal means not being able to wake up and work out in the morning, not being hungry ever (which mitigates the not being able to work out part), feeling like you're going to pass out half the time and feeling stoned the other half of the time. And still not able to sit and read a book for hours. Oh well--so much for that--can't say I didn't try. Guess I'll just have to live the next 40 years of my life the same as I lived the first 40: multitasking and hyper.
Nothing much else is new, mostly because I've spent the past 2 weeks either at kid events or sitting on the sofa doing what Patrick calls "the death stare"--staring into space for long periods of time.
I'm having a personal crisis today. As I've blogged about before, I'm addicted to Botox. Sorry if that makes me not only crazy and hyper but vain and stupid, but it's the truth: once you've had a perfectly smooth forehead and no crows feet, there's no going back. Luckily for me, there are plenty of others who are equally vain and stupid, because it at least brings the price down slightly when you go to a Botox party as opposed to a doctor or medspa.
A "Botox party" of course being where at least 5 other people go get shot up at the same time, which means the doctor charges less because he doesn't have to open a new vial--each vial apparently needing to be used up or thrown out and each costing a fortune. Or at least that's what they lead you to think; for all I know Botox actually isn't more expensive per drop than life itself. Peddling Botox is probably more lucrative than peddling crack, at $20-$50 (or more) a "unit"--a unit being a microdroplet, of which you need about 50 or 100 to achieve numb perfection--I figure it's a pretty good racket.
At any rate, here's my dilemma. The Botox party is tomorrow...but today, when going to Amazon to buy next month's book club book--I saw this. The Kindle 2--perfect in every way--no more books to clutter up your life or weigh you down when you travel, wirelessly grab any book out of thin air for $9.99, etc--AND it reads aloud to you if you want. Which means no more having to spend 2 hours laboriously copying library audiobooks into iTunes then another hour figuring out how to load the thing onto your iPod in the correct order.
Anyway, the Kindle 2 costs $359. Outrageous--of course I'd never buy it. But wait. I'm about to shell out at least that much to iron out my forehead for 4 months. I never think about the money part of Botox--I save that money in a separate account and, 3 or 4 times a year, pretend I'm not writing that check for $400. Why don't I just not get the Botox and buy a Kindle if I want to waste $359?
After all, who the hell is looking at me anyway? I'm 40 and married and live in Olney, MD. It's not like I'm a movie star or even a news anchor--it honestly couldn't matter less whether my forehead has lines on it or not. But I'm telling you--once you've gotten it done once, you're done for. Even if they botch it and you end up having to walk around with one eyelid drooping like a stroke patient's for 2 weeks; it's like childbirth: you forget the horrible memories and want to do it again and again.
Then there's the peer pressure of the party--the more people that come, the cheaper it is. So I don't want to be the one who makes it cost more for everyone else, right?
Sigh. Maybe I will develop some self-respect and character by tomorrow and turn my nose up at vanity and Botox forever. Or, more likely, maybe I'll win $359 when I go to Vegas next weekend and use that to buy the Kindle 2. That's in addition to the $250 I already have to win to buy an iPod Touch, of course.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Gen Whine In The House
Yesterday I made the mistake of watching a video of Penelope Trunk giving a speech about Gen-Yers in the workplace. The same now-cliche stuff about managing 20-somethings: don't expect them to "pay dues" because they'll walk if they have to do grunt work like other generations had to; keep them motivated with treats or special incentives every day or they'll walk; don't hassle them if they seem to be doing nothing but listening to iPods and web-surfing all day or they'll walk. In short, treat them with kid gloves because they are so spectacular that we can't afford to piss them off. The rationale being that they're soon going to be overtaking the workforce so we better just let them have their way.
First of all, bullshit. As far as the whole "soon all the Boomers will be retiring" thing--I think everyone knows that is no longer a valid sentiment, what with the state of the economy. Anyone who was even close to retiring a year ago is now most likely looking at another 10+ years in the workforce before they might be able to even consider retiring. And second of all, bullshit--even if they do retire there are still droves of Gen-Xers who are unemployed and willing--not to mention well-qualified--to do the jobs Gen-Yers scoff at. After all, if you have a mortgage, a car payment, credit card debt, kids, a spouse, etc--you don't have the luxury of hiding out in mom and dad's basement until you find a job that pays six figures and consists of one never-ending brainstorming session while hanging out in a treehouse or some equally cool and laid-back work environment.
Enter the blog post that set me off on this rant. Penelope Trunk has a guest poster on her blog today--a 23 year old writing about why it's smart to quit a job after just two weeks of work. The crux of her rationale being, of course, the tenet upon which the entire Gen-Y work philosophy is based: living with mom n' dad. After all, 65% of new grads do it--so of course it's a good idea.
I digress about the rest of the post; you can read it yourself. And don't miss the comments--those are some of the best parts. Here's one of my favorites:
Like forgetting the daily reward or making you spend time at the copier?
Wait--there's more:
The "something negative" of course being that the lazy, self-centered entry level person left of his own free will, thereby sparing the company the considerable time, money and hassle it would have taken to fire that person had they and their bad attitude stayed in the job.
Call me a bitter Gen-Xer if you want--I have no problem owning that. And I'm not even one to talk about sticking it out in jobs--I'm the first to admit my resume is filled with jobs that I stayed in for a year before deciding I couldn't stand it and found something better. However, one thing I can say is that I always found a better job, always had health-insurance paid for by me--not my parents--and moving back in with them was never an option.
I've asked this in previous posts: where has the stereotype of the adult loser who lives in his parents' house gone? Have 20-somethings never seen Wedding Crashers? Stepbrothers? Failure to Launch? Call it what you will: saving money, being prudent, giving yourself the opportunity to wait for the perfect job--the fact remains that being 20- or--god-forbid--30-something and living with your parents is nothing to brag about.
Yesterday I made the mistake of watching a video of Penelope Trunk giving a speech about Gen-Yers in the workplace. The same now-cliche stuff about managing 20-somethings: don't expect them to "pay dues" because they'll walk if they have to do grunt work like other generations had to; keep them motivated with treats or special incentives every day or they'll walk; don't hassle them if they seem to be doing nothing but listening to iPods and web-surfing all day or they'll walk. In short, treat them with kid gloves because they are so spectacular that we can't afford to piss them off. The rationale being that they're soon going to be overtaking the workforce so we better just let them have their way.
First of all, bullshit. As far as the whole "soon all the Boomers will be retiring" thing--I think everyone knows that is no longer a valid sentiment, what with the state of the economy. Anyone who was even close to retiring a year ago is now most likely looking at another 10+ years in the workforce before they might be able to even consider retiring. And second of all, bullshit--even if they do retire there are still droves of Gen-Xers who are unemployed and willing--not to mention well-qualified--to do the jobs Gen-Yers scoff at. After all, if you have a mortgage, a car payment, credit card debt, kids, a spouse, etc--you don't have the luxury of hiding out in mom and dad's basement until you find a job that pays six figures and consists of one never-ending brainstorming session while hanging out in a treehouse or some equally cool and laid-back work environment.
Enter the blog post that set me off on this rant. Penelope Trunk has a guest poster on her blog today--a 23 year old writing about why it's smart to quit a job after just two weeks of work. The crux of her rationale being, of course, the tenet upon which the entire Gen-Y work philosophy is based: living with mom n' dad. After all, 65% of new grads do it--so of course it's a good idea.
I digress about the rest of the post; you can read it yourself. And don't miss the comments--those are some of the best parts. Here's one of my favorites:
"I quit a job after two weeks too, but I don't believe the company felt I was doing them a favor. (I was, as indicated in the post.) They are not contemplative enough to consider the possibility that they did something - actually, many things - wrong."
Like forgetting the daily reward or making you spend time at the copier?
Wait--there's more:
"Companies are no more likely than individual people to improve their attitudes or practices when something negative happens."
The "something negative" of course being that the lazy, self-centered entry level person left of his own free will, thereby sparing the company the considerable time, money and hassle it would have taken to fire that person had they and their bad attitude stayed in the job.
Call me a bitter Gen-Xer if you want--I have no problem owning that. And I'm not even one to talk about sticking it out in jobs--I'm the first to admit my resume is filled with jobs that I stayed in for a year before deciding I couldn't stand it and found something better. However, one thing I can say is that I always found a better job, always had health-insurance paid for by me--not my parents--and moving back in with them was never an option.
I've asked this in previous posts: where has the stereotype of the adult loser who lives in his parents' house gone? Have 20-somethings never seen Wedding Crashers? Stepbrothers? Failure to Launch? Call it what you will: saving money, being prudent, giving yourself the opportunity to wait for the perfect job--the fact remains that being 20- or--god-forbid--30-something and living with your parents is nothing to brag about.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Not Feeling It
Wow--I feel bad abandoning this poor blog--there's nothing but crickets going on in here lately. Between working, writing in my other blog, taking care of kids, and spending time with Patrick, there just never seems to be any time left to write in here. Not to mention any creative juices I may have had are getting used up in less creative endeavors like writing about Twitter and Facebook.
Then--as if the busy schedule weren't enough to suck the life out of this blog--enter Strattera. It's for ADHD and supposed to make you be able to concentrate like a normal person; however, for me "normal" seems to translate into "lethargic and boring." Whereas before Strattera I was able to do 20 things at once, such as work, keep up with two blogs, read a million blogs a day, stay on top of gmail and work email--AND Twitter--now it's all I can do to plod through one thing at a time. Granted, I've only been taking it for a few days--hopefully I won't be forever stuck feeling like a stoned train wreck. Not to mention nauseous and with a horrible headache.
Even in my Strattera fog I am able to stay on-topic; however--I was checking out one of my favorite websites, Crazymeds to see if the wicked headaches I've been having are a side effect of the Strattera and realized that Jerod Poore--awesome creator of Crazymeds--refers to himself as a "citizen medical expert." In other words, FIO doctor. And the thing is that he totally rocks and is actually better, smarter and far more knowledgeable about meds than any doctor I've ever known.
In fact, Jerod Poore's expertise is the reason I'm on Strattera in the first place. I met with my doctor--who charges $120 for 30 minutes--and said I'd read about Strattera and it sounded like it would work for me. He got all excited and was like I think this would actually work really well for you, etc, etc. Here I've been going to this guy for several years, every 3 months or whatever, $120 a pop, and the way it always plays out is that I look something up on crazymeds and suggest it to him and he prescribes it.
Anyway, if you ever have questions about any psychopharmalogical substance, go see what Jerod has to say about it on crazymeds. I do have to say that the layout of the site is insanely bad, but it's worth weeding through the horrible navigation because nowhere else will you find such comprehensive, detailed reviews of every single crazy med known to man.
Wow--I feel bad abandoning this poor blog--there's nothing but crickets going on in here lately. Between working, writing in my other blog, taking care of kids, and spending time with Patrick, there just never seems to be any time left to write in here. Not to mention any creative juices I may have had are getting used up in less creative endeavors like writing about Twitter and Facebook.
Then--as if the busy schedule weren't enough to suck the life out of this blog--enter Strattera. It's for ADHD and supposed to make you be able to concentrate like a normal person; however, for me "normal" seems to translate into "lethargic and boring." Whereas before Strattera I was able to do 20 things at once, such as work, keep up with two blogs, read a million blogs a day, stay on top of gmail and work email--AND Twitter--now it's all I can do to plod through one thing at a time. Granted, I've only been taking it for a few days--hopefully I won't be forever stuck feeling like a stoned train wreck. Not to mention nauseous and with a horrible headache.
Even in my Strattera fog I am able to stay on-topic; however--I was checking out one of my favorite websites, Crazymeds to see if the wicked headaches I've been having are a side effect of the Strattera and realized that Jerod Poore--awesome creator of Crazymeds--refers to himself as a "citizen medical expert." In other words, FIO doctor. And the thing is that he totally rocks and is actually better, smarter and far more knowledgeable about meds than any doctor I've ever known.
In fact, Jerod Poore's expertise is the reason I'm on Strattera in the first place. I met with my doctor--who charges $120 for 30 minutes--and said I'd read about Strattera and it sounded like it would work for me. He got all excited and was like I think this would actually work really well for you, etc, etc. Here I've been going to this guy for several years, every 3 months or whatever, $120 a pop, and the way it always plays out is that I look something up on crazymeds and suggest it to him and he prescribes it.
Anyway, if you ever have questions about any psychopharmalogical substance, go see what Jerod has to say about it on crazymeds. I do have to say that the layout of the site is insanely bad, but it's worth weeding through the horrible navigation because nowhere else will you find such comprehensive, detailed reviews of every single crazy med known to man.
Sunday, March 01, 2009
Weekending
This weekend I have been multi-tasking the relaxation--listening to an audiobook (Jodi Piccoult's A Change of Heart), reading Anita Shreve's Testimony, maxing out on Zuma, and basically logging in an embarrassing amount of sofa time. What, no movies, you ask? Please. Patrick and I saw Push on Thursday (I gave it about a 7.5; Patrick gave it a 6.5) and today I saw Confessions of a Shopaholic (Mimi gave it a zero (shocker) and I gave it about a 6).
The thing I liked about Shopaholic was that the whole thing centered around a girl getting her dream job basically by accident. Everyone couldn't get enough of the fact that she was a total bumbler with no knowledge whatsoever of finance, yet she became more and more successful just by being quirky and doing stuff nobody else was stupid--I mean daring--enough to do. Oh, and she had big boobs and showed a LOT of cleavage. And wore really short skirts and 5" heels.
Speaking of whores--whoops--sorry to dis the shopaholic girl like that--I'm watching My Super Sweet 16 with the kids now. This show is so horrible it's addictive. Two episodes ago I told them we could watch ONE and that was all...now we're on the third because it's so scary/sad/riveting. These girls are only barely 16 and look and act like Girls Gone Wild. Soooo depressing, especially considering that Mimi is almost 13 so it's only a matter of time until her friends start looking and acting like this. Notice I say "her friends" because there's no way in hell she's going to be dressing or acting like these girls.
Anyway, I better go--have to get ready for the next wave of entertainment: Desperate Housewives, United States of Tara and Secret Diary of a Call Girl.
This weekend I have been multi-tasking the relaxation--listening to an audiobook (Jodi Piccoult's A Change of Heart), reading Anita Shreve's Testimony, maxing out on Zuma, and basically logging in an embarrassing amount of sofa time. What, no movies, you ask? Please. Patrick and I saw Push on Thursday (I gave it about a 7.5; Patrick gave it a 6.5) and today I saw Confessions of a Shopaholic (Mimi gave it a zero (shocker) and I gave it about a 6).
The thing I liked about Shopaholic was that the whole thing centered around a girl getting her dream job basically by accident. Everyone couldn't get enough of the fact that she was a total bumbler with no knowledge whatsoever of finance, yet she became more and more successful just by being quirky and doing stuff nobody else was stupid--I mean daring--enough to do. Oh, and she had big boobs and showed a LOT of cleavage. And wore really short skirts and 5" heels.
Speaking of whores--whoops--sorry to dis the shopaholic girl like that--I'm watching My Super Sweet 16 with the kids now. This show is so horrible it's addictive. Two episodes ago I told them we could watch ONE and that was all...now we're on the third because it's so scary/sad/riveting. These girls are only barely 16 and look and act like Girls Gone Wild. Soooo depressing, especially considering that Mimi is almost 13 so it's only a matter of time until her friends start looking and acting like this. Notice I say "her friends" because there's no way in hell she's going to be dressing or acting like these girls.
Anyway, I better go--have to get ready for the next wave of entertainment: Desperate Housewives, United States of Tara and Secret Diary of a Call Girl.
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