Happy 4th

Whew, I'm coming over here to escape the drama shitstorm happening on my other blog right now. Apparently the secret to big blog activity is insulting internet big-wigs. All I know is that I think I just might make enough money off blogging this month to buy a #1 meal at McDonald's thanks to this whole exchange. I think I make $5 per 1,000 page impressions with BlogHer ads on that blog, and I think in the past 24 hours I've gotten over 500. Don't let anyone try to tell you making money blogging is easy--or for the thin-skinned. There are plenty of other ways to make $5 that don't involve having 20+ strangers point out what a stupid asshole you are for daring to criticize an internet celeb.

I'm tellin' you, it's hard out here for a pimp.

Compare blogging as a way of making money to being a lawyer--yesterday I had to visit one to address some custody issues that I'm getting sick of dealing with. His hourly rate? $325. If you want to make money, clearly being a lawyer is the way to go over blogging.

Anyway, a lot has happened since I last posted. Jon and Kate are no more, for one. I've seen a ton of movies--I can't even keep track anymore. Off the top of my head:
Transformers--rocked
Public Enemies--didn't exactly suck but was kind of a yawner
The Hangover--was pretty funny but not hysterical or anything
The Taking of Pelham 123--ROCKED
Night at the Museum--was ok
Land of the Lost--SUCKED. Sadly.
Angels & Demons--I think it pretty much rocked--saw it a while ago
Star Trek--rocked

Off the top of my head, that's all I can remember.

Just read an awesome book--Look Me In the Eye: My Life with Aspergers by Augusten's brother, John Elder Robison. I LOVE this book and was sad when it ended. I sort of figured it probably just got published because he's Augusten's brother, but I have to say the book totally holds its own and he holds his own as a writer. He better be working on his next book because now I love him almost as much as I love Augusten.

I'm finally reading Ayelet Waldman's book and LOVE it so far.

One thing the combination of the blog throwdown and Ayelet Waldman's book is making me think about is social media as a career and how, while it seems to be tailor-made for women with kids (can work from home, set your own schedule, etc) I personally think it is one of the most time-consuming and intrusive careers you can pick if you're a women with kids. I'm not talking about a career like mine--doing social media for an organization; I'm talking about being a social media guru--writing books, blogging, speaking...AND keeping up with 80,0000 or more people on Twitter. Think about it--even if you're a lawyer or some other time-intensive professional--at the end of your 80 hour week at least you get to go home, play golf, watch TV, travel, whatever. If you're a social media celeb, when do you get a break? Never. Your work is YOU, basically--you are expected to be on 24/7. Ayelet Waldman's book is all about how it's impossible to be a good mother yet easy to qualify as a good dad.

I have to go to the pool with Patrick and the kids now (bad mommy blogging on 4th of July).

Tired
I keep feeling bad for neglecting this blog...and then I just keep right on neglecting it. I don't know why but it's just easier to write my other blog. I guess because I'm limited to the subject of social media--it makes it easier to narrow down the 20 million things I could be blogging about.

John and Kate Plus 8

Have you ever watched this show? Aside from drinking in Kate's hair (color=perfect; style=jury's still out), there's really no reason to watch it. A couple with 8 kids and what they do on a day to day basis. Yawn.

Yawn no more, though. Even if you don't admit to reading Star, People, US, or any of those other magazines, if you set foot in grocery stores or pharmacies, you have to admit you've at least seen the recent headlines about John and Kate. And/or seen her on the Today show.

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Long story short: watching a family with 8 kids is interesting for about 8 minutes. Their 8 minutes are long over, but their family is now totally dependent on the income that the show brings in. Aside from Kate having written 2 books and doing some public speaking, the way she and John support their family is by living in the equivalent of a dollhouse with no back on TV for the whole world to watch and comment on. What happens, though, when this is your money model and people lose interest in watching you? I guess you're shit out of luck. Or, you start doing stuff that people are interested in. Like cheating on your spouse or fighting. Suddenly the worlds' ears/eyes perk up. Including mine.

So tonight I will be watching the season premier of John and Kate Plus 8, but not with baited breath like the rest of the world. I know the whole thing is a ruse. The producers of this show sat down with John and Kate a season ago and told them look, you're boring. If you don't want to have to go get real jobs like the rest of the world, you're going to have to let us write some drama and scandal into your scripts. So John will be playing the part of guilty cheating husband, just praying that his kids aren't old enough to realize what a pansy sell-out he is for not putting his foot down and telling his wife enough is enough, get the fucking cameras out of our house or I'm leaving. And Kate will be playing the poor, victimized mom who just wants the best for her family--even though she has not one ounce of respect for her husband and is gladly letting this show ruin her family because she can't stand the thought of letting go of the gravy train.

In the meantime, if you're looking for some entertainment, go have a look at the comment section of this mommy blog post. When they cancel John and Kate Plus 8 at the end of this season, I hope they start a reality show about feuding mommy bloggers.

Oh, and you know I am submitting my blogs to be reviewed by "Ask And Ye Shall Receive." Check out the url; how could you not be curious? And I promise not to go mommy-blogger on them if they skewer me.

Mommy Bloggers

I don't know why but recently I've become fixated on the whole mommy blogger thing. In case you have no idea what I'm talking about when I say mommy bloggers, I'm talking about Power Moms who companies are falling all over themselves trying to woo into hawking their products and services. I'm talking about women like Jessica Gottlieb, who get invited to the American Idol finale and party, and Jessica Smith, who is a Ford Flex spokesmom and gets to do stuff like be flown to Santa Barbara to stay at the Four Seasons hotel, work out with Oprah Winfrey's personal trainer and receive makeovers as part of a 30-day challenge on an upcoming fitness video program for the Nintendo Wii. This is how these ladies roll.

How lucky are they? Or...are they?

First of all, there seems to be a lot of heat on the collective mommy bloggers lately--the FTC is in the process of revising their guidelines relating to bloggers, based, it seems, largely on the tons of moms out there who are endorsing products on their blogs. I've already written about this stuff in my other blog so I won't rehash it here, except to say that, as you can see from those three posts, I'm not really feeling the whole blogging for money thing. Or I didn't think I was.

I honestly don't know, though--I mean, it depends how much money we're talking I guess. If I were able to make a reliable income blogging and do it full time, would I? Especially if my kids were little and it meant I could be home with them? If it meant I got stuff like free trips to Disney for the whole family and other free stuff and cool perks, would I feel differently? I'm kind of thinking yes.

What I do know is this: where there are women, there is drama. Rivalry. Cattyness. How could there not be? We're talking about not only women, but moms--the most judgemental population imaginable. Now in addition to criticizing each others' choices about parenting, breastfeeding and working outside the home, they can criticize each others' blogging styles and methods.

Honestly, it's better than TV.

The White House is Now a Black House

If you read this blog you know I'm obsessed with movies about black families. I love them--read that post if you want to know why. (Mimi is sitting next to me while I'm writing this, muttering "racist!" because I said "black families"--but you know I don't mean it like that.)

Anyway, I just heard that the Obamas are having a poetry slam at the White House tonight and I couldn't help but think that no white presidential family ever had stuff like poetry slams. Or comedians saying totally irreverent things at White House dinners.



Let me tell you this: if I could go back in time I would go back and reverse my stance on not voting and vote for Obama because he ROCKS. I stand officially corrected (go ahead and gloat, Beth.)

Calling All Worst Parents Ever: This Book's For You

Hey moms--despite your best efforts did you fail to earn Best Parent Ever status yet again this year? Not sure? Take a look at my Worst Parent Ever scale and see if you can hang with the WPEs. If you can, you'll probably want to read Ayelet Waldman's new book "Bad Mother: A Chronicle of Maternal Crimes, Minor Calamities, and Occasional Moments of Grace."

Ayelet Waldman earned herself a place in the WPE hall of fame when she admitted, in an article in the New York Times, that she loved her husband more than her kids. Oh, and that she actually enjoys having sex with her husband and they do it more than twice a year for his birthday and their anniversary. Her admission set the BPE world on fire and landed her on the Oprah show. Surprised at the fury her statement incited, she did what any WPE in her situation (e.g. smart and already famous) would do: wrote a book about it.

Talk about a genius idea for a book--what mom WON'T want to buy this book? After all, doesn't every woman, no matter how bad a mom she fears she may be, want to read about one who's worse than she is?

The Power of a Big Mouth

I'm thinking that it's probably time to move the post with the p-word down a notch, no?

I would say nothing much is new and/or exciting, but actually the past two days have been sort of exciting, in a if-you-call-this-exciting-you-are-pathetic kind of way, at least. Yesterday there was a flurry of twittering and blogging about a new association website--so I added my two cents. Within like 15 minutes of me posting the link to my post on Twitter, 150 people had clicked through to it. People tweeted about it, blogged about it...and now the CEO of ASAE is blogging about it.

Guess it's a good thing I didn't call the post "The Power of WTF" as I initially started to, right?